1. How would you describe your relationship to R-----t M-----ch?
a) I have none
b) I party with his daughter
c) I horse-ride with his chief executive
2. From where do you get money?
b) the government
c) the media
3. How does the media obtain information about you?
c) through my PR department
4. How does the media generally represent you?
a) as I do not wish
b) as I am
c) as I wish
5. What recourse do you have if the media represent you unfavourably?
b) a counterstatement
c) a D-Notice
If your answers are mostly a) congratulations! you have passed The Dowler Test with flying colours. Demand the profit motive be removed from the media by nationalising it. If your answers are mostly b) you have passed the test by the narrowest margin. Call for paradoxical independent self-regulation. If your answers are mostly c) you have failed the test. Do nothing.